- Internet Police -
- Immediate Release -
The Internet Police today warned of the above-pictured man, Chris K, as a possible cyber bully. Long thought of as being the alter-ego of master Luddite Ted Kaczynski, authorities now suspect that the evilness runs much deeper than that.
Also known as "The Boston Strangler" for his repeated threats against the city on his blog, BQ or Die, he prefers the moniker, "The Dodo." Rumored to reside in a heavily fortified seaside mansion in Southern California, this man has rained his evil bile upon unsuspecting bloggers everywhere, though the usual target is a mild-mannered father of four and public servant, Kovas.
Urged on by his known associates Meg (She Runs A Lot), "Barefoot" Neil Z, and Tri-Gangsta Patrick, The Dodo has unleashed a reign of terror unequalled in history excepting for Robespierre and possibly Ronald McDonald. Consider the following photographic evidence:
|Note international cyber bullying|
|Evilness clearly evident - parents, please shield young children's eyes|
Scores of civic-minded bloggers have responded, calling for the foam roller treatment, with no punishment considered too cruel or unusual. In a comradely gesture, Intergalactic politicians joined together to enact a Universal Law that Chris K need not be unfashionably dressed in order to be mocked. A mommy blogger was quoted as saying "He doesn't deserve those pink compression socks! Can't someone take them away?" Kovas, being high-minded and respectful of opponents he has regularly beaten, simply replied with this: "Can't we all just get along?"
Bloggers worldwide are urged to circle February 6th, 2011 on their calendars, when Chris K has publicly stated that a grand gesture will be made. Public holiday or public humiliation, history will be the judge.
(PS Good luck at Surf City Chris - break a leg!) :)